I've never been so angry in my life.

So, you know how I said I didn't have the words. Well I woke up this morning with a thought, why was none of his messages from saturday night in my inbox? Or my sent items? Umm I delete everything anyways, but usually I delete them. They don't magically disappear. So I checked my Received and Missed calls, and surly enough his name was gone from their too. So remember how I also said, I KNOW he would have gone through my phone, even thou I don't have proof, I just KNOW cause that's the type of sick insecure person he is. Well, suprise suprise, I was right. And now if he denies anything I do have proof.

What a fucking asshole. I new, like I NEW already the second I realised my phone was left behind its implications... But I didnt think he would make it this obvious that he would blatantly go though my shit. Fml. Is he normal? I'm so infuriated with rage its not even funny. And now I have the words. As soon as I realised I messaged him something along the lines off this. (Ok ok its the exact wording)

"So why didn't you just delete your number from my contacts too while you were at it? Your right I should never have trusted you. Your so pathetic. You can have alllllllllll the space you need. Do not call or message me, if you see me out - pretend you don't know me. I'm so so done. Enjoy your space."

Go me. So I did it myself. Deleted his number from my contacts, deleted everything. Deleted his number from my email. From my facebook. From anywhere he has ever sent it to me again after we've lost contact.

Being an asshole, being a piece of shit, treating me like crap, only calling me when he wants something, when he is bored or its convenient for him. Not wanting people to even know we are friends, let alone a relationship. For some reason I could deal with that. I would tell myself, he will get over it, he's not an asshole he is just emotionally screwed. He is not messing with me he just doesn't want a girlfriend. For some reason, I could deal with alllllll that.

But going through my phone, blatantly deleting himself from my phone, from my life. I can not deal with that. I can not deal with the invasion of privacy let alone the trust issues. I'm glad this has happened. Its a big big wake up call. A massive slap in the face that I needed. It is the first and last time i will EVER cry over this boy. Cry... ball my eyes out... over this boy. All i can say is this bastard is damn lucky i belive in karma.

This is my chance to set a massive process in motion. A courageous move that I probably wouldn't have been able to stick by otherwise. This is a positive step forwards. And damn straight its his loss.